Parents and siblings waiting in line to pick up their children on the first day of preschool in Denver, Colorado.
The public portion of my daughter's education began this past Thursday when I somewhat reluctantly dropped her off at her new preschool. I could protest and push a little harder for the homeschooling option, but my daughter wouldn't go for that in a million years. She has been chomping at the bit to go to school since she was 2 years old.
The first day was really interesting for me. There were so many families from all different cultures represented among the families that were attending. Right away I felt as if this would be a valuable experience for my daughter. I want her to grow up with an open mind and an open heart. Penelope is 3 years old, she uses her Kindle like a pro, and recites words to me in Spanish (which is a direct result of her addiction to Handy Manny and my bad parenting skills) frequently. She is tall for her age, and can be extremely emotional about the littlest thing, as I'm sure any parent of a three year old can attest to.
I would be lying if I said I wasn't worried about what could happen to her while she is not under my care. I'm leaving her care to people that I have only just met recently. I can only depend on what I know from the research I have done on the school. I'm not going to run background checks on her teachers or anything, but I certainly hope that the school system did their due diligence. I would be crushed if something senseless happened to my daughter and I wasn't there to defend her.
This is the leap of faith that we as parents take. I am not going to force my child to be home schooled because I am too paranoid to send her to school because of horrible atrocities that I see on the news. So I think about the good things, the friends she will make, the experiences she will have, and the lessons she will learn. I leave the rest to chance, and the belief that I have done my best to assure her safety and surrounded her with good people who are looking out for her best interests.
These are my thoughts and concerns on the day I dropped my daughter off at preschool. It's a lot to think about and it stresses me out. The worst part is, she is only going on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 9-12.. It seems lke a lot to think about for that short amount of time that she will be gone, but I put myself in the shoes of those parents who have lost their loved ones in mass shootings across the nation, and I feel that helpless empty feeling of losing a child.My heart says keep her close and don't let her go, but in the end it's her life, and if she insists that she wants to go to school who am I to stop her?
For now I will be waiting with baited breath at the school every Tuesday and Thursday at noon, waiting for my baby girl to be back in my arms, safe and sound.